I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
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