I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
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