Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
