if only i could text you this smell
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
