i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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