Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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