I'm lost and stupid without you.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize