You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
