Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
