Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
