I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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