Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
