i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
