I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
