And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
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