I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
