where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I can't turn off my feet"
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
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