i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize