I think I died a long time ago.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
