Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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