He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
