sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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