quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
