Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
