I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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