He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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