I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
She made me pour olive oil on her.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize