I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
