oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
