remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
