THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
