is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
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