I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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