I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
