it was like eating out sand paper
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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