He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
