Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
