i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
wow bdsm is so cute
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