shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
All the doctor said was why
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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