a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
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