it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
