Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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