Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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