now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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