Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
