he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
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