It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
