the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
My feet surprised me
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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