I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
