Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
