So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
